What is a Highly Sensitive Person?
A highly sensitive person is described as someone who is hypersensitive to external stimuli. They generally think and feel more deeply, and may be more emotionally reactive.
Have you ever wondered what it’s like to be a highly sensitive person?
Elena Herdieckerhoff provides a wonderful explanation and insight into being highly sensitive in the following presentation. This video is a great resource for helping you understand your highly sensitive loved ones.
What can you do to enhance your relationship with your highly sensitive loved one?
1. Don’t take it personally when they need more alone time.
Highly sensitive people need more time and space to recharge their batteries. Remember, it’s not that they don’t want to spend time with you – they just need a little more quiet solitude to manage the stimuli of day-to-day life.
2. Avoid telling them that they are, “too sensitive,” or that they need to toughen up. Instead, try validating their emotions.
Highly sensitive people are generally aware that they feel more deeply and intensely than others. Sensitivity is not a weakness! Highly sensitive people are generally very strong individuals. Imagine for a moment if lights appeared brighter, noises seemed louder, and you could tangibly feel the emotions of others you encountered throughout the day. It takes a great deal of strength to manage these more intense internal and external experiences. The more you can validate their emotional expression, the more they will appreciate your understanding and support.
3. Watch the volume and content.
Highly sensitive people are often sensitive to loud noises, and can feel overwhelmed by them. You might think it’s really awesome to have an at-home movie theatre experience, but remember to check in with your highly sensitive loved one to see if the experience is equally amazing for them. Many highly sensitive people also have trouble watching violent and intense films. Be sensitive to their individual sensitivities, and respect their desire to steer clear of certain types of over-stimulating movies and programs.
4. Engage in meaningful conversations.
Highly sensitive people value deep and meaningful connections. They often get bored by, or impatient with superficial chats. If you are able to open yourself up more fully, your highly sensitive person will value you and your relationship much more profoundly.
5. Be patient.
It often takes the highly sensitive person a little longer to make decisions. They generally need more time to ponder the possible outcomes due to their vivid and profound thought life.
6. Be mindful of your tone and expression.
Highly sensitive people are often highly intuitive, as well. Don’t be surprised when they take notice of a subtle change in your expression, or small variation in your tone of voice. One of the perks of being highly sensitive is easily feeling in tune with those around them.
7. Don’t assume they will ask for what they want.
Highly sensitive people often love tending to others, and in their mind, your wants and needs will often win out over their own. They can be people-pleasers, and try very hard to avoid conflict. For this reason, they might not always express their own needs and desires. Try checking in with your highly sensitive loved one occasionally, and allow them unbiased space to ask for what they want.
Kristen Henshaw, a Licensed Professional Counselor Intern at Counseling South Austin under the supervision of Ann Stoneson, LPC-S, specializes in supporting the highly sensitive person navigate through their unique life experiences. Her additional areas of specialization include trauma recovery, life transitions, and caregivers' issues. She offers an affirming environment for members of the Trans and LBGQ communities. Contact her for your free thirty-minute in-person consultation.